Feeling helpless is one of the worst kinds of a feeling a human being might get. Whether a girl who feels helpless when getting harassed or a guy feeling helpless defending her.
After what happened during the stand against sexual harassment last Friday I went through the phase of denial where I convinced myself that everybody got out just “fine”, and that “It will get better soon”, etc… I started hanging out with no trouble whatsoever until I met one of the girls who were with us in the stand a couple of days later.
Just seeing the look on her face sitting alone holding her clothes doing nothing but looking at the ground for hours awakened me to see what actually happened that night and how somehow I managed to block it away from my mind. I started talking to her to know what what exactly happened and up till now I don’t know how I managed to hold myself from crying.
“The guy had his hands on my chest, groping. I had a pair of scissors in my pocket just in case if something happened but I was terrified that he might harm me if I got them out. So, I kept on begging him to stop and let me go but he never listened. I gave up, I thought of leaving him to do what he was doing and then he will leave by himself eventually. I saw a group of thugs harassing a lady right beside me so I was even terrified to make a sound as I thought that they might leave her and then they would all turn on me” And that was what she said.
I felt helpless! all I did was calling ElNadeem centre and fixed her an appointment with their psychiatrist as she was in need for professional help. The psychiatrist there said that she had symptoms just like that of a post-rape trauma.
Going through the phases of anger and depression where I stand still .. yup, still helpless.
That girl whom I mentioned is coming to the stand next Friday, when I heard so I knew what exactly should be done. We will be there, not ready to fight but ready to severely harm anyone who would dare touching any of the girls. I am now convinced that if a couple of those bastards got severely beaten up or even castrated, others will reconsider and back off; specially that the whole area lack the presence of police force and the law isn’t applied, then it is totally legal to defend ourselves.
Whether if those bastards are doing it voluntarily or if they were getting paid to stab our revolutionaries in their will, we will fight them to death and we will never reach the phase of acceptance and that is what matters. I hope it turns out to be a great success not by men defending women but men and women standing up side by side against the regime and the society.